12
Oct

JESUS E-MAILS VULNERABLE KIDS ONLINE


♫ We communicate to God every time we pray! ♫ ♫ It’s true, we can talk to him every day! ♫ Let’s go surfing! ♫ (Christian surf music) ♫ Surf’s up on science! Yeah! (dial-up Jesus modem sounds) With computers, we can instantly talk to our friends around the world. I know how to use the internet. Internet. ♫ (Christian stock music “Wipe Out” knock off) ♫ A server! (a sad man drowning) ♫ Today, you could send a message on the net! ♫ ♫ And it only takes a couple milliseconds to get! ♫ And now, a Great Communicator! Jesus was a great communicator. Hey baby, what you doin’ Friday night? When someone says that we should hold our tongue, they don’t mean with your fingers! Let’s follow that e-mail you just sent! EVERY computer on the internet. Hey, I heard of that. This looks like where your friend Meg gets her e-mail. Whoa, Meg must be checking her e-mail RIGHT NOW! We’re going through her modem into her computer’s motherboard! Woo, we’re on her screen! Hi, Chip! You should check out the website I sent you! How do I do that? The internet has all kinds of websites. Meg sent me this one. It’s a page of dancing hamsters. It’s funny. (hamster jazz stock music) Nyeo nyeo. Nyeo nyeo. Nyeo nyeo. Nyeo nyeo. NAR. NAR. NAR. NAR. York. Yerk. Yerk. You can make your own ear drum at home. ♫ Jesus loves me, THIS I KNOW! ♫ ♫ For the Bible TELLS ME SO! ♫ ♫ SO so ♫ Do you know that you can talk to someone who really loves you? And you don’t even need a phone. Jesus wants to know ALL about YOU. He wants to talk to you every day. He does that through prayer and the Bible. WHYYYYY?! (humorless child dies laughing) STOP talking!

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